fresh sheets

February 1st, 2020 § 1 comment § permalink

I love it when you come out of a flu or a cold and you strip the bed and put on fresh sheets. I’ve been sweating and shivering through the past few nights, with some awful bug. But today in the afternoon it broke, and I finished a Groundwater lab, wrote up leases for my new tenants, and washed the dishes that had piled up. Tonight, I went to a movie with my sweet partner and another friend of theirs and we ate candy for dinner.

I felt so connected to this day, because for me it was such a before/after time horizon. I find that I live in time intervals where I am measuring each moment in comparison to “this time last year”. Recently it has become more pronounced, because time slowed down this year. My feet felt heaver, and moving felt harder. Did the gravity of the planet change?

Maybe I’m almost in the clear. Maybe I will even be able to write about something other than my own emotional weather soon!

– – –

One year ago today I decided to end my marriage. I woke up in the morning, called my husband and said this is enough. At the time it felt like the hardest thing I would ever do.

Two years ago today, my boat was anchored in the Robeson group of Kuna Yala, and I was traveling to Panama City to meet my parents and tour with them around Gamboa and the Canal Zone.

Three years ago today I was back on Cumberland Island in Georgia, and saw wild horses and sat in the tiny Spanish moss-draped chapel where JFK Jr. married Carolyn Bessette. We had been up and down the whole coast four times by then, plus one time for a job.

Four years ago today I was down in St. Marys, on the GA-FL border, and felt that now-common belly curdle of being surrounded by men in red baseball caps. We were on to refit 2.0.

Five years ago today I working two desk jobs – one in Brunswick and one in Savannah, and before and after work I poked around every nook and cranny on the Georgia coast. 

Six years ago today was my first foggy winter in the lowcountry. We went all that way hand-steering, and were done with refit 1.0.

Seven years ago today, I still had my apartment in Greenpoint, and I was eating Polish food, running NCA, and was goofing around at places like Lorimer House and Enids. We had just bought the boat.

Enids camel

Eight years ago today I was beginning a long distance correspondence with a sailor who lived on a boat thousands of miles away.

Nine years ago today the North Brooklyn Compost Project was in full swing and I was collaborating with Jackie Brookner, who was still with us.

Ten years ago today I was gardening at Bellevue hospital, running the SWIM Coalition, and was about to run for local office.

 

arriving at the starting line

May 30th, 2016 § 7 comments § permalink

We are back on the water, although we have barely moved since we splashed five days ago. The last two years have been near-constant boat work, punctuated by “real work” to pay for it (and stay sane), with the last two months containing an absolutely inconceivable amount of heavy lifting. Last night we both scrolled through photos on our various devices, and I had a very hard time placing the images in their realistic timeline.

Do you ever have periods of your life that seem compressed, as if time actually slows down? It is disorienting when that sort of time comes to a close. It is also pretty awesome I have to say.

No sand dollars were harmed in the making of this mandala-to-go.

On our way down to St.Marys (to visit a locally-famous boatyard that we loved and enjoyed thoroughly), we stopped in the Brickhill River behind Cumberland Island to rendezvous with our friends Debbie and Brian, who – as luck would have it – were just wrapping their work period in the very same yard.

As we headed into the danger zone – leaving the water in May – it brought life to a harrowing moment to see these two fresh-faced beauties shaking off the yard dirt. Debbie and I took a jaunt across the island and hurled ourselves into the sea just for emphasis.
Lil DebSo it is with great flourish that I write this tonight, having miraculously re-splashed our boat, having both lost and found our cat, having cheered Dawn Treader to Bermuda, having watched an entire season of Battlestar Galactica in an embarrassingly short amount of time, and having finally gotten back to the starting line, live from Brickhill River.
Beta on deck

lost cat

May 2nd, 2016 § 3 comments § permalink

This is going to be a post about my cat/s, and it will be quite long. [TRIGGER WARNING]

I met Beta around the same time I met my husband. He (the cat) was born in Greenpoint, USA, near the home of my friend Jane, who sort of tricked me into adopting him. Which is to say, she invited me over and plopped him into my lap. He was one-handful old.

At that time I already had a calico cat named Kitten, who was more needy than I ever imagined any cat could be. I was constantly harassed by Kitten every time I left the apartment, and her punishment would resume as soon as she heard my returning footsteps in the building. My stern landlord, who lived on the ground floor, maintained silence in the building. As the top-floor tenant who worked irregular hours and had to clip-clop up and down the linoleum central stair a million times a day, schlepping Godknowswhat and with the cat howling… our relationship was tense. So I would sneak in like a ninja, scaling the walls, to stave off Kitten’s racket out of fear that she would get us kicked out of this below-market-rate apartment – aka the holy grail. I know that’s a lot to put on a cat.

So Beta came home at 8 weeks old, to be my second cat – hence the name – as playmate for Kitten. This is how it starts with cats and cat ladies.

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Beta fit in perfectly. Kitten stopped guilt tripping me, and bossed the new guy around instead. But Beta didn’t pay no mind, because this dude was CHILL. If he wanted food, he headbutted you. If he wanted to play, there was some string. No drama. One time he got really and suddenly sick, the way cats like to do right before you are about to leave for vacation. Nursing him back to health was the only time I think he really made eye contact with me. “Thanks”, he said, with his big golden eyeballs. He put his paw on my paw.

When I half-moved onto the boat, the cats stayed put with my cat-friendly friend and subletter – lets call her Joski. When it later became clear that I was going all in, I struggled to find new homes for both cats. I always feel a twinge of something about this part of the story, that I couldn’t be a “furever home” for Beta and Kitten, and that I leaned so much on Joski to place them. Bad human.

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Come to think of it, I’ve never written about what it was like to leave New York. This part with the apartment and the cats was something quite difficult. When you chip out a little secret sanctuary for yourself over the course of many years, pulling the nest apart makes an utter mess.

Beta and Kitten were ultimately separated, and Joski took over the lease. My last towhold in the city was a storage locker with a duffle bag of journals in it overlooking Newtown Creek.

But wait, there’s more!

Just when I thought the dust had settled, Beta was returned by his new humans because they were getting evicted! Drama! That was it, I couldn’t bear this catragedy any longer. By this time, we had sailed all the way down the coast. So I got on what we call “the Midnight Train From Georgia”, which is actually the Amtrak leaving from Jesup at 7pm, arriving Penn Station at 11am. Who takes an overnight train from the rural Deep South to NYC? Ponder that one awhile, but at least one answer is: Cat Ladies.

I collected my bag of journals and my Beta, and we road tripped down I-95 back to the boat. Imagine Thelma and Louise, except his paw was on my paw and no one died or was hurt in any way.

The Little Island is a book by Margaret Wise Brown, which tells the tale of a little black cat that goes on a sail with his humans and explores a small island and the sea around it. I imagined Beta’s life aboard would be like this, and I sometimes tried to see our adventures through his eyes. We attempted to give him enough freedom to still be an animal, but keep him reliant enough on us that he would always come home for dinner and let us protect him.

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When he hopped off the boat one week ago, I expected him to walk the dock and be right back for string time. We have replayed it so many times.

Right now we are in a boatyard on the GA/FL border, doing heavy work in some major swamp heat. Looking for Beta has brought us into contact with a growing spiral of neighbors, as the days pass and we widen our search. In a certain part of Camden County, Beta has better name recognition than most presidential candidates. Let’s just say clipboards are involved.

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We have moments of deep missing, despair for all the potential dangers Beta may have already encountered, and also regret for what we failed to do.

But I also try to imagine this adventure through his eyes, the one where he ditches out on this rough patch of yard time and opts for some squirrel hunting in the moss-draped oaks of Point Peter instead. I imagine him grazing on pond frogs and tuning his satellite dish-ears on barred owl calls. Further down the bluff there is a stalled subdivision with an expanse of forest symmetrically fragmented with pristine asphalt roads. Perhaps he’s doing some survey work down there and will report back to me soon with some land use recommendations.

Is this is The Revenge of Kitten, wherein Beta is her Manchurian Candidate, performing the ultimate manipulation of human hearts?

We will need to leave this place in a week or maybe two, and Beta will either saunter back onto the boat like NBD, or we will need to accept that he’s really gone all in. Wish us all luck.

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